Say Her Name, Say Her Name!

"Don’t be afraid to say her name. Don’t be afraid to mention her. Don’t be afraid that your words will cause added pain, because they won’t. They will keep her memory alive and give me the opportunity to share her greatness. Mention her, always. Tell me stories I haven’t heard. Tell me what you remember most about her. Remind me of the old times, the good times, the times when she was here." - Chelsea Ohlemiller, Now That She's Gone (Page 191)

Want to know the hardest thing I've experienced while grieving my mom? The longer it's been since her funeral, the less often we say her name. It feels like she's slipping away, not from my heart, but from the conversations around me. I find myself aching to hear her name more often. 

 

I know it's not because her loved ones have forgotten about her. I know it's not because they don't miss and love her dearly. I just don't know what it is. Is it discomfort in talking about those who have passed? Is it fear of upsetting me? Is it too hard to talk about someone you miss so dearly?

 

PLEASE continue saying her name. Tell me stories I've never heard. Tell me stories I've heard 1,000 times. Ask questions. Show me your favourite pictures, dig up pictures I've never seen. Every story someone shares about Mom is like a new piece of her that I get to keep. Some stories I’ve heard a hundred times, and they’re like comfort blankets I wrap around myself when I’m missing her. Others are brand new, stories I never knew, and those are gifts - moments of her life that I get to hold onto forever.

 

She is and always will be...

MOM to me and to my brother.

GRAMMA to my niece and nephew, and any future children I might have.

LEE / LEE ANN to the rest of the world.

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P.P.S. If you want to buy a copy of Chelsea's book, you can order it here.